As O’Neill said, you want there to be mutual empowerment when it comes to sex, and that definitely doesn’t come from pressuring someone into sex when they don’t want to have it. If you’re the partner with the higher sex drive, try not to guilt trip your partner for not being in the mood for sex, and certainly don’t force them to do anything they don’t want to do.
Also, you shouldn’t feel guilty or like a bad partner if you aren’t in the right headspace for sex. Talking about it can help your partner understand where your head’s at, hopefully allowing them to take it less personally. Instead, be candid about what is surpressing your sex drive, if you can pinpoint it. If you’re the partner with the low sex drive, don’t feel pressured to give in to sex just because you don’t want to upset him or her. You and your partner should try to communicate as openly and honestly as possible, so you can better understand each other’s perspective.
WOMEN LOW LIMBO DRIVE HOW TO
Work as a team to determine how to cultivate a sense of excitement, enthusiasm, and mutual empowerment related to sexual exploration.”Ĭommunication, as always, is key. “Next, work on ways to feel comfortable communicating with your partner about your sexual desire. “First, let go of the idea of sex drive,” says O’Neill. You might actually find it helpful to reframe your mindset. But by placing so much pressure on sex, you might make things even worse. Sex is obviously an important part of a relationship, there’s no getting around that. Coping With Low Sex Drive in a Relationship
“It’s not uncommon for a sort of cycle to emerge where one partner experiences low desire and the other partner tries to overcompensate by pressuring their partner for sex, which generally only leads to feelings of shame, guilt, and frustration for both parties,” says O’Neill.Īny of these behaviors can result in negative tension on the relationship, especially if they carry on long term. On top of this, unhealthy patterns might emerge if a partner starts to get selfish or pushy when it comes to sex. The partner may feel extra self conscious thinking that they are the problem. When someone internalizes and conflates their partner’s low sex drive with their own attractiveness or desireability as a partner, it can really put a damper on their self esteem. Often, an individual who experiences low sexual desire may begin to believe that there is something wrong with them, which can lead to feelings of shame and guilt.” “Instead of discussing sexual desire and things that make an individual feel sexually aroused, individuals may internalize the issue of low desire as some sort of personal shortcoming on their part. “The myths associated with sex drive can often lead to confusion, frustration, and hurt feelings within the relationship,” says Talkspace provider Rachel O’Neill, Ph.D. As discussed above, there are plenty of reasons someone might have a low sex drive, and a lot of them aren’t related to the other partner at all. Oftentimes, someone may take it personally if their partner has a low desire for sex and think that there’s something wrong with them, when this certainly isn’t necessarily the case. After all, sex is a big part of romantic relationships, and when there’s a strain on your sex life, it’s likely to carry over and strain the relationship as a whole. When one or both partners experience low sex drive, it can definitely have an effect on the relationship.
WOMEN LOW LIMBO DRIVE FREE
Take our free mental health test The Effect of a Low Sex Drive on a Relationship Being depressed can make it really hard to focus on enjoying anything, even sex. Depression - It’s common for depressed people to both lose the ability to feel pleasure and the desire to do things they once enjoyed.Whether you’re dealing with extra stress at work or extra stress at home, the effects can spill over into the bedroom. Some people experience GI problems when they’re stressed, some get headaches, and some their lose desire for sex. Stress - If you’ve gone through periods of high stress, you’re probably well aware of the effect it can have on your physical health.Excessive drinking and/or drug use - Sure, some people love to have a glass of wine to relax a bit and help them get in the mood before sex, but excessive drinking and illicit drugs have been known to affect sex drive negatively.Women’s birth control pills can also result in decreased interest in sex. These side effects are notorious for causing less interest in sex and problems with arousal. SSRIs (a common type of antidepressants, including Zoloft, Paxil, and Prozac to name a few). Medications -Some medications have side effects that can impact sex drive.Some common causes of low libido include (but are not limited to): Plenty of things contribute to libido and can cause you or your partner’s sex drive to be low.
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